NURSE THEMBENI
CHAPTER 8
THEMBENI
There’s something warm and heavy all over me. At first, my body reacts then my mind follows. There is pressure on my arm, lips brushing my cheek, my jaw, my temple. It’s slow, lazy kisses, that make no sense to me right now. My heart jumps straight into my throat.
I suck in a loud breath and jerk awake. For one terrifying second, I don’t know where I am or who is touching me. All I know is that someone is in my bed and I did not invite them to be here.
“What…!”
“It’s okay, it’s me.” A calm voice stops me from jumping from the bed.
That stupid voice settles something in me before I can stop it. My shoulders drop, and my breathing slows.
“Golide.”
“It’s Mehlo… good morning, Phakade lami.”
Mxm!
I’m still shaken, so I lie still, letting that sink in. I just need my heart come back down from my ears. Oh no, it’s bright outside. Golide spent the night.
I turn my head to him, maybe I’m dreaming. Nope, he is right here. Hair messy, eyes half-closed, mouth dangerously close to smiling. One arm is slung over my waist as if it has always belonged there. I know this man did not spend the night in my room when he had absolutely no right to.
It is morning for God’s sake and he is still here. He was supposed to leave before sunrise, before people woke up.
I try to move but his arm tightens immediately, pulling me back against him.
“Let me go,” I whisper, panic creeping into my voice.
He exhales against my neck.
“Why?”
“Because it’s morning, people are awake.”
“I am aware.” He says.
He’s so calm, I can’t deal with him right now. I try again to get free. He shifts, not letting me go, his body fitting against mine in a way that feels far too practiced for a man who does not do this.
“I am still tired, let’s sleep.” He says.
My nerves are screaming now.
“Mehlo, this is not funny.”
He hums softly, as if he disagrees with me, and cuddles closer. His chin settles on my shoulder, his arm stays firm around my waist. My back is pressed to his chest and I hate how right it feels.
This has never happened, never like this. We do not wake up together, we do not hold each other in the morning. Golide does not linger.
I finally manage to wriggle free and sit up. My heart is racing as I stand, scanning the room. In my head, someone might already be watching.
He turns onto his back, completely unbothered. Look at him stretching, he’s too comfortable in my bed. He puts his hands behind his head, and relaxes.
“This is not a hotel, get out of my bed, Golide.”
“I don’t know who that is.” He says.
I am not a morning person, he must not try me.
A knock sounds at the door.
“Themi, are you awake?”
That’s my niece. I rush to the door just as it starts opening and slam it shut with my whole weight.
“I’m coming!” I shout.
“Okay!” she calls cheerfully from outside.
I lean my forehead against the door, breathing through my nose, and counting to three. When I turn around, Golide is watching me amused.
“Why are you still lying there? This is not normal?”
He lifts an eyebrow. “You invited me in.”
“I did not invite you to move in. Get up. Why are you acting like a troublesome boyfriend?”
A corner of his mouth lifts.
“That is a compliment, I believe.” he says.
I am not doing this with him, it’s too early. I grab my bathing things and uniform.
“I am going to bath, I still have to go to work. Please lock the door, Mehlo. Don’t get me into trouble with my brothers.”
“I will lock.”
If I come back and he is still here, I will lock him inside and take the key with me. My morning has already gone wrong. I am not looking forward to the rest of it.
.
.
My parents are sitting under the big tree near the kraal, they seem deep in conversation. They are each other’s best friends, you would swear they wake up with unfinished sentences from yesterday.
They look old and it’s not the polite kind of old people say when they mean wise. My father’s hair is completely grey now, his back curved it’s like time has been sitting on him for years, he uses a walking stick. He looks like someone’s grandfather, which makes sense because he is. Just not mine.
My mother is thinner than she used to be.
They had me very late in life, so late that by the time I learned to walk, my brothers were already deciding things for me. That is how Mkhululi ended up half-brother, half-father, full-time headache.
I decide to greet them quickly before I bath. If I don’t do it now, someone will accuse me of being rude, and I am tired of collecting accusations like certificates.
I take two steps toward them.
“Thembeni.” Mkhululi’s wife appears in front of me, I must have summoned her with my thoughts.
“MaThabethe.” That’s what we call her around here, otherwise she’s Philile when she gets annoying.
She’s blocked my path completely and looks me up and down the way nurses examine patients they already don’t like. From my head, to my chest, to my feet. I fight the urge to check if my shirt is inside out.
“Is everything okay?” I ask.
She tilts her head. “Are you still a virgin?”
My brain scrambles to catch up because there are many things I expected her to say and that was not one of them. Then it clicks. Of course, Mkhululi. This woman knows everything that happens under his sun. There is not a sneeze in this homestead that he doesn’t report to his wife.
She does not even wait for my answer.
“My husband told me what you did last night. The man you were with last night took your virginity?”
I feel my stomach twist, I hate that Mkhululi shares my life with his wife. My life is not community property. I hate that there is no privacy, no corner of my life that is not inspected and discussed over supper.
“I don’t see how that concerns you,” I say.
She sighs, I can’t tell if she is disappointed or surprised.
“You need to take care of yourself, Thembeni. You cannot be running around with men when you have already been chosen to be married to the chief.”
Marrying the chief is the last thing she cares about, she’s been trying to convince me not to do it.
“I did not choose him, I never did.”
“You are very picky for someone who is not that pretty.”
It should not sting. She has said it before, more than once. But it still does, because I am human and because it is never nice to be reminded that someone has been keeping score of your face.
“A lot of girls would do anything to be married to the chief, and you are throwing away the opportunity.”
Philile is a terrible actor, she was told to give me a lecture by my dear brother Mkhululi. He forgot to ask if she’s good at acting.
“Then those girls can have him, I don’t want him.” I say.
She lets out a short laugh, almost a cackle, full of disbelief.
“You are not a princess, Thembeni. Stop acting like one. One day you will wake up old and alone, eighty years old, with no husband, and you will regret this nonsense.”
I open my mouth to respond and stop because I see Ngcwele approaching from the corner of my eye. His face is already unhappy. He has that look he gets when he feels someone is crossing a line. He’s always hated how MaThabethe mothers me, like marrying my brother somehow gave her a second child.
She probably saw Mkhululi parenting me and thought she could join in.
“Are you okay?” Ngcwele asks me when he reaches us.
“Yes, I’m fine.”
He turns to Philile and greets her politely.
“Is there anything you need from my sister?”
“I was just advising her, I don’t want her losing her innocence to strange men.” Philile says.
“That’s okay, that is my job. You take care of my brother and my niece, and leave Thembeni to me.” Ngcwele.
Philile looks offended now. She glances at me, then at Ngcwele. She knows how he gets when it comes to me, there is nothing she can say after this.
Madam presses her lips together, sighs dramatically, and turns away without another word.
I watch her go, God… my head is buzzing.
“Go bath sisi, you will be late for work” Ngcwele says.
Has he forgotten that I still have to go to the palace? Mkhululi won’t let me go to work. He will drag me to the palace if he has to. My family is exhausting.
.
.
I come back from bathing feeling slightly braver than I did before, with the sole purpose of confronting the man who refused to leave my bed.
His car is not here. Where did he park it? My brothers would have already thrown a fit if they had seen a car they did not recognise. Maybe he moved it. Or he left.
I almost turn back toward the bathroom, to regroup and maybe pray, when my eyes land on the tree, and my entire world stops.
What is Chief Menzi doing here? Did he sleep on the way here? We are still suffering from morning breath and he’s already braced us with his presence.
He’s talking with my parents, my mother is smiling politely, my father nodding, and right in front of him, on her knees, is Ntando, holding a tray of food.
A hand grabs mine suddenly and pulls me sideways.
“Come,” Philile whispers urgently, dragging me toward the kitchen rondavel.
“What is wrong with you? What happened?”
She glances toward the tree. “Ntando is serving the chief, you don’t need to go there.”
Is that why she’s whispering?
“Am I contagious?”
“The chief will see you and his focus will leave Ntando.” She says.
Oh, now I get it. Ntando is selling herself to the chief and I am not allowed to interrupt. Okay, got it. Ntando walks in, her face is glowing. The only time I see her blush like this is when the chief is around.
Her mother Philile’s panic melts instantly into excitement.
“What did he say, nono?”
Ntando presses her lips together, trying not to smile and failing completely.
“He just said thank you.”
“That’s all? Did he say anything about your dress? The way you smell?” Philile.
Ntando giggles. “No mama, but he smells very nice.”
“Of course he does. But let’s be honest, Ntando, you smell like smoke from the fire. He’s probably used to that.” I tell her.
Ntando laughs with me, Philile does not. She looks personally attacked.
“You don’t know anything,” she snaps. “I sprayed her with the perfume your brother bought me in Durban.”
“Oh. You mean the one that smells like dog pee.” I ask.
Philile rolls her eyes so hard I worry for her vision. She turns back to her daughter, smiling again.
“Go sit there and wait, Nono. The chief might want something.”
Ntando agrees happily and leaves.
Philile turns to me. “You must go to work. We have everything under control.”
“My brother told me to apologize for missing lunch yesterday. You know how he can be.” She knows Mkhululi will come looking for me at work.
“I will apologise for you, your niece and I will handle him. Go.” She says.
Philile knows it is impossible to leave this yard without the chief seeing me unless I teleport. She sighs in irritation as I start laughing.
“What is funny now?”
“Does my brother know that you are setting your daughter up with the chief again,” I say.
She clicks her tongue. “You are starting with your nonsense.”
Okay, let me not start with my nonsense. I head out, Mkhululi has joined my parents. Ntando is sitting on the floor next to my mother.
This is just great. How will Golide leave now with this many eyes.”
“Thembeni!” Mkhululi has spotted me.
I walk over, the chief’s eyes narrow slightly as he looks at me. He’s clearly upset about last night.
I sit next to my mother and greet the chief respectfully. He asks how I am.
“I am fine,” I say.
“The chief is here to inform you that the wedding has been moved.” My brother announces.
I hope he moved it to twenty years from now.
“Moved when?”
“To this week,” he says.
I knew it was too good to be true.
“But that’s too soon. What happened to next month, bhuti?”
“Stop talking back.” Mkhululi snaps.
“I agree with Thembeni, it is too soon. She’s not prepared.”
I almost laugh in disbelief. Is this Philile standing up for me? The woman who just inspected my virginity is now defending my future. Mkhululi gives her a look that could start a war. She sits down.
“It has been decided, the wedding will be in three days.” My brother says.
Three days is too soon, I haven’t even swallowed the realization yet. I’m not ready to commit myself to this man. I look at the chief. He does not object, his face is serious. This is not a discussion to him, it’s logistics.
Ngcwele is not here, the one brother who would soften this moment, and slow things down, is nowhere to be seen. I feel cornered, surrounded by a future I did not ask for.
I stand up, my hands are trembling.
“I am not ready to marry the chief, or anyone. I don’t want to get married.”
“Thembeni is right, maybe Ntando can take her place.” Philile says.
The chief’s eyes turn deadly, he glares at Philile, and she drops her gaze at once.
Someone clears their throat behind us, we all turn. My blood turns cold and my heart slams so hard it hurts. It’s Golide, the man I left in my room.
He should not exist in this yard right now. What is he doing here? Is he mad? He’s trying to get me killed? I feel dizzy. This is it, this is how my life ends. How did he get out of the room? I did not even see him.
“Bayede, Ngwane kaNgwadi.” That’s my father, he’s on his knees, in front of Mehlokazulu. He’s got it all wrong, Golide is not the chief, Menzi is. I knew his eyes failed him years ago.
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We should be getting chapters early in the morning, but we reach targets late in the day. Let’s try to move a little faster and get morning chapters as well. The story is still new, we should be getting inserts 6 to 7 hours apart.
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