NURSE THEMBENI
CHAPTER 7
MENZI
The guards come in like men already condemned. Heads bowed so low their chins almost touch their chests. They line up against the wall, four shadows in uniform, and they don’t dare look up. Not at me, not at my father.
I can feel the air change the second the door closes behind them. My father is standing by the window, back to them, arms crossed. He doesn’t turn around right away. He just lets the silence grow until it’s thick enough to choke on.
“Where is she?” he finally asks.
Bheki, the one who’s supposed to be in charge clears his throat first.
“We didn’t bring her.”
My father’s shoulders go rigid, he turns slowly which is so very dramatic of him. His face is calm, but I know that look. It’s the one he wears right before the shouting starts.
“You didn’t bring her,” he repeats.
It’s not even a question, every word is measured, and I know he’s counting how many ways he can punish them.
“Explain.” He says.
Bheki keeps his eyes on the floor.
“She was in a car with Inkosi uNgwane.”
My father lets out a short, bitter laugh. All hell is about to break loose, that name is forbidden in this palace. It hasn’t echoed through these walls in years. Bheki has no idea what he has done. My father walks up to the guard at the door and snatches his spear. Then steps closer, his face is inches from Bheki’s.
“Say his name again.”
Bheki’s eyes run to the guards, I think he’s just realized he wasn’t supposed to say that name.
“Mehlokazulu Mthunzi… son of Mvula Mthunzi.” Bheki’s voice trembles.
My father grabs Bheki by the collar.
“Louder!”
“Mehlokazulu Mthunzi son of Mvula Mthunzi!” Bheki shouts.
My father shoves him back, Bheki stumbles into the wall.
“Baba…”
I’m halfway up my seat and Bheki is on the floor, swimming in his own blood. My father just stabbed him with a spear, right in the heart.
The other guards step back, trembling out of their socks.
“Baba, why did you do that?”
He doesn’t spare me a glance, despite my outrage.
“Four armed guards of the royal house, and you let one man walk away with your future queen? What did he say exactly?” He’s shouting at the guards.
“How will they answer you when you’ve just killed their leader, baba?”
“Thula wena?” He roars, pointing a finger at me without even turning to look at me.
“No, Hlongwane. I am in charge here, and I order you to look at me when I’m talking to you.” I match the loudness of his voice.
He turns and a smile spreads on his face.
“Now, that’s my son. This is the kind of man I want you to be, a man with authority.”
What is wrong with him?
“Baba, you just killed a man.”
“He had it coming. Who is Inkosi uNgwane? Uttering that name is punishable by death.” he says and turns to the guards. “Now, tell me what that stupid boy Mehlokazulu said to you.”
“He said… he will bring KaMajola to the palace himself.” One of them says.
“And you believed him?” My father’s voice drops to a dangerous whisper.
The guard nods.
“You believed him?” He explodes. “You let Mvula’s bastard lie to you and you wagged your tails like dogs?”
The guards flinch, none of them speak.
“All of you, look at me.”
They lift their heads, terrified.
“You answer to this throne, to Chief Menzi Hlongwane and no one else. You fools had one job, one. Bring her here, and instead you come back with excuses and fear in your eyes.”
They all nod in unison.
“Strip your uniforms… now, all of you. Weapons on the table. You are no longer guards of this house, you are nothing. Bloody cowards.”
Their hands shake as they start unbuttoning. Why am I sitting on this throne if he’s the one calling the shots? What is my purpose then?
He looks at me.
“You see this? This is how you lead your people, Menzi.”
That’s not me, I am not going to shed blood for this throne. It’s not my fight but his.
He turns back to the guards. “Get out, and if I see any of you near this palace again, I will have you buried where no one will find you.”
They hurry out the door.
“Someone get this dog out of here, throw it in the river of feed it to the pigs.” He orders the guards at the door, calling Bheki a dog is diabolical after taking his life.
Two guards scramble, dragging Bheki out like a sack of potatoes.
He looks at the throne in the corner, it’s for the first time in years that I see real fear in his eyes.
“Menzi, if that boy marries KaMajola first. We will lose everything, we will be the ones banished from this place. I want them d’ead, all of them. Father, son, mother. Even their dogs should be k’illed.”
No, I’m not getting my hands dirty.
“Hlongwane, it has not come to that.”
“Ngithi mina, bulala kwasani.” He roars. (k’ill them all.)
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THEMBENI
My brothers are still laughing like hyenas when Golide finally stops groaning. He is on his knees in the dirt, one hand braced against the ground, the other cupping himself, he is trying to keep his dignity from running away without him. I feel instantly sick.
What kind of stupid woman does what I did?
I drop to my knees beside him before my brain can stop me.
“Mehlo,” I whisper, panic creeping into my voice. “Are you okay?”
He wheezes and tries to nod, then gives up halfway.
“I will… survive.”
“Thembeni, what are you doing? Leave him there.”
Oh how fast Mkhululi’s laughter died, he’s breathing fire all of a sudden.
I do not even look at him. I slide my arm under Golide’s shoulder and try to help him up. He is heavy, solid. Usually, he feels unmovable, except right now his legs are clearly refusing to cooperate.
Mkhululi grabs my wrist.
“I said leave him. Why are you helping this man?”
I yank my arm free, annoyed and crying now.
“Because I kicked him, bhut’ Mkhu. I am not a monster, okay.”
Lindani snorts. “Since when? You said if you ever saw him again, you would kick his nuts.”
I feel heat rush to my face, they know he is not my transport driver. They just want to punish Golide for even daring to look at me.
“That was a figure of speech.”
What am I saying? The laughter is gone now. All three of them are staring at me. I focus on helping Golide, he finally manages to get one foot under himself. I steady him as he stands. He winces, his jaw tightening. When he is fully upright, he looks at my brothers, the pain does not exist anymore.
“I apologise for bringing your sister home late,” he says evenly.
Mkhululi folds his arms, I want to roll my eyes.
“I am not her driver.” Golide glances at me briefly, just long enough for my stomach to do the cha-cha, then looks back at them.
“I am the man who wants to marry her.”
Complete, deadly silence. I am suddenly very aware that I am standing in my father’s yard, in front of three men who have known me since birth, while my ‘blesser’ just volunteered for public execution.
This man is trying to get himself k’illed.
“Repeat that.” Mkhululi sounds annoyed.
“Who the hell are you to stand in our father’s yard and speak like that?” My brother Lindani barks.
“I am not here to disrespect anyone, I am stating my intention. Thembeni is the woman I intend to marry.”
My heart is pounding so hard I can hear it in my ears. I want to tell him to stop talking. I want to tell him to run. I also want to cry louder, because no one has ever said something like that about me, out loud, in front of witnesses. In front of my brothers. Men in this village know you don’t approach Thembeni Majola if you want to see the light of day, but here is Mehlokazulu, brave as brass.
Mkhululi scoffs. “You speak like she belongs to you.”
“She belongs to herself,” Golide says immediately. “I’m the one who belongs to her.”
Shwele baba! Why am I being tested?
Mkhululi takes a threatening step forward, my brother is as tall as Golide, he’s also all muscle. There’s a scar on his left eye, right above his eyebrow that makes him look thuggish. But I doubt he can touch Golide, Mehlo eats danger for breakfast.
Ngcwele stands in front of Mkhululi. “Let us calm down, bhuti. There’s no need for any of this.”
Mkhululi ignores him. “You drop our sister here, then announce marriage? Do you know who she is promised to?”
“I do and I respect your customs. That is why I would never take her without speaking properly.”
Lindani laughs harshly. “Are you deaf? She’s already spoken for, slima. No money or flashy cars will impress us or our sister.”
Why is he lying? I am more than impressed. Heck, they can even change my name to Impressed.
Golide does not react to the insult, he is after all a man of a few words.
“Don’t get me wrong, Majola. But money has nothing to do with it. I don’t want to impress your sister, I want to deserve her.”
Huh? Did I kick his balls, or his brain? What kind of talk is this? He sounds like he jumped out of a Zulu romance movie.
“Bhuti, this is Mehlokazulu Mthunzi. He’s my friend, he did not mean any harm. He’s a good man.”
Lindani cuts me off. “Do not defend him, Thembeni. You brought him here to disrespect us.”
“Leave.” Mkhululi points toward the gate.
Golide looks at me.
“I will go, I did not come here to cause trouble.”
He turns and walks away, he’s clearly still in pain. I feel bad for kicking him. He’s disappeared in the dark again, I see him again when he opens the car. He gets in, starts it, and drives off.
The moment his taillights disappear, Mkhululi turns on me.
“What is wrong with you? You missed supper with the chief for that man?”
He doesn’t have to yell at me.
“Shouting will not help, bhuti.” Ngcwele comes to my rescue, he’s the only brother with a heart.
“Where were you anyway? Don’t lie again.” Lindani says.
They will suffer from heart attacks if I tell them who Mehlo is to me.
“Why can’t you be serious about life for once Thembeni? Don’t you have respect for yourself and your parents?” Mkhululi must be a comedian.
My parents have nothing to do with this, nothing. I don’t remember my father agreeing that I marry the chief.
“This is not a game, Thembeni. The whole village knows you’re promised, and you’re out here gallivanting with some rich fool?”
Ngcwele puts a hand on his shoulder. “It’s late, she has work tomorrow. Let her sleep.”
“No. She’s not going to work tomorrow. She’s waking up and going to the royal palace to apologise in front of the whole family. She should’ve thought of work before doing nonsense.”
Lindani smokes weed for a living because there is no way this just came out of his mouth. I can’t argue, they will gang up on me.
“This is the last time you’re seen with that fool, or you will regret the day you were born. Go to your room.” Mkhululi snaps.
My brothers are controlling, always have been. I didn’t ask to be promised to the chief. I didn’t ask for any of this. I just want to live without anyone expecting me to be perfect just because there is a chief waiting to make me his wife. There is nothing I can say that will not make it worse.
I do not argue further. I walk to my rondavel, lock the door behind me, and collapse onto the bed. I feel burdened because there is too much I want to say and nowhere safe to say it.
I did not ask to be promised, I did not ask to be owned by tradition. I just wanted one choice that was mine.
There’s a knock on the door. What now? I’m sure it’s Mkhululi, he wants to finish me off. That’s the only way he will be able to sleep.
I crack the door open, I’m welcomed by darkness and before I can speak, lips crash into mine. Hands are on my face and lips are on mine. He pushes inside, kicking the door shut without breaking the kiss.
His thumbs brush under my eyes, wiping away tears I did not realize were there. I pull back first, breathless and annoyed with myself.
“What are you doing here?”
He does not look embarrassed, he never does. He just looks at me, like the answer should be obvious.
“You were crying.”
I fold my arms. “That is not a reason, that is an observation.”
“I could not leave,” he says simply.
I narrow my eyes at him. “You expect me to believe that, Mehlokazulu?”
He shrugs slightly, to him, belief is optional. That irritates me more than if he had argued. Then I remember that I had kicked him, my eyes run down to his lower part.
“Are you okay?”
He shakes his head. That should mean no, right? But this is Golide. When it comes to him, I never know if no means no, or I will survive, or ask better questions.
“Does it hurt?” I ask seriously. “I need to know so I can calculate how big my sin is.”
He looks at me and sighs. “It still hurts, kiss it better.”
He must be drunk on sleep. Or gravity. Or audacity. Because I know he did not just say that.
“I am not kissing your balls,” I say flatly.
He hums, he expected me to say this. The man turns around as if this is his father’s house, kicks off his shoes, sits on my bed, and lies back comfortably, his broad shoulders resting against my headboard.
“Then I am not leaving until the pain subsides.”
I stare at him, shocked.
“Mehlo, you cannot stay here. If my brothers find you in my room, I am dead meat.”
“They will shout, you will survive.” He says.
“Oh, you are very confident,” I snap. “You have not met Mkhululi’s fist. He once punched a guy I liked in nursing school and the man fainted.”
“Strong man.” Golide looks impressed, truly impressed.
Before I can stop him, he sits up, pulls off his jeans and t-shirt. I know he thinks this is the most normal thing in the world but I find it absurd, absolutely insane. He climbs back onto my bed in just his trunks, I stop breathing. He shifts over, patting the empty space.
“You can sleep, I will not touch you.” He says.
I do not move, I just stare at him.
His left eyebrow lifts. “Am I on your side of the bed? I can move.”
I sigh deeply, what is the point of arguing with him? I have lost the argument without ever agreeing to it. I change into my nightwear because this man is clearly not leaving. Then I lie down with my back to him, stiff as a plank. If he touches me, I will scream.
A second later, the mattress dips. He moves closer and pulls me into him, I’m swallowed by his arms. My back presses against his chest, his arm is over my stomach and he’s breathing into my neck.
We have done many things, but this? This is not us. Golide does not cuddle. Golide pays, takes, and leaves. He does not hold.
“What are you doing?” I ask quietly.
His arm tightens around my waist.
“I am looking for a way into your heart.”
I scoff. “What happened to the route you always use?”
“The money way?” he asks.
“Yes, that one, it has worked very well for you.”
He chuckles softly against my neck.
“That’s your way, Themi, and it does not lead to your heart, so I’m trying it my way now.”
I turn my head slightly. “What makes your way special?”
“Because mine is for you, only you. It will make you forget you ever needed my money.”
“Get out of my room,” I push him off.
He laughs, ladies and gentlemen, Mehlokazulu just laughed. He’s pulled me back into his embrace.
“You love money, Themi. But that will all change soon, I will not share your heart with anything or anyone.”
Mxm! I can’t believe I’m held by a man who has never held me before, wondering when exactly this stopped being a deal and started becoming something dangerous.
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