\u00a0<\/p>\n
204 I don\u2019t care!\u00a0<\/p>\n
204 I don\u2019t care!\u00a0<\/p>\n
Leilani.\u00a0<\/p>\n
It took several minutes- if not hours- before I was able to calm Jarek down, and after successfully convincing him over and over again that I wasn\u2019t hurt that he\u2019d \u2018hit\u2019 me\u2026 that I could never be mad at him, he finally slept off with his large arms wrapped around my stomach, while I could only stare at his peacefully sleeping form, wondering what I could do about his ailment.. and hoping to the goddess that he doesn\u2019t wake up to another episode.\u00a0<\/p>\n
I do not know for how long I stayed there, listening to his heartbeat and soft snores, but by the time I finally came to again, I realized to my surprise that I was now in his bed, wrapped under the protection of his bedsheets. My jacket was long gone and so were my shoes\u2026 and Jarek who seemed to have disappeared without a trace.\u00a0<\/p>\n
I slowly rose to a sitting position and looked around the room, admiring the dark gray walls with white finishing. Everything in the room was a perfect blend of gray and white\u2026 well besides the chandelier which was a beautiful large black monster.\u00a0<\/p>\n
Just then, the door creaked open\u2026 and maybe it was because of everything I\u2019d gone through these past few days and heard, but I found myself jumping in surprise. I turned swiftly to the sound, half-ready to lunge at whoever it was if it was a \u2018threat\u2019.\u00a0<\/p>\n
However, when the smell of scrambled eggs hit my nostrils instead, my tense\u00a0<\/p>\n
shoulders loosened.\u00a0<\/p>\n
I sighed; \u201cJay?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
His eyes lit up at my voice and I watched him quietly as he pushed into the room with a large tray in hand. Now, he looked different with his long hair styled into the messiest messy bun I\u2019ve ever seen on anybody- which was also the hottest bun I have\u00a0<\/p>\n
ever seen as well\u2026\u00a0<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t ask me how that\u2019s possible\u2026 I just know. 1\u00a0<\/p>\n
He also looked like he\u2019d spent most of the last three hours showering just to throw on an apron at the last minute, which\u2026 *chuckles*\u2026which had images of SpongeBob scattered all over it.\u00a0<\/p>\n
I smiled. \u201cYou cooked?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cFor you, yes!\u201d He answered, and my breath caught when he placed the tray onto his reading table and then leaned over to plant a kiss on my forehead, his voice soft as he\u00a0<\/p>\n
15:38\u00a0<\/p>\n
1\/5\u00a0<\/p>\n
204 I don\u2019t care!\u00a0<\/p>\n
whispered the words; \u201cThank you.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
I frowned. I wanted to ask him what he was thankful for.\u00a0<\/p>\n
I wanted to know why he would do all of these for me.\u00a0<\/p>\n
But as soon as I opened my mouth to speak, he took my hands in his and plopped into the bed beside me. But something in his gaze told me that I would probably not like what he was about to say\u2026 something in the way he couldn\u2019t look me in the eyes made my heart race.\u00a0<\/p>\n
My hands trembled slightly but because he held firmly, I was fine. And then he said softly; \u201cI\u2019ll be going away for a while.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
Goddess, I was right! I am always right!\u00a0<\/p>\n
My face fell. \u201cWhy?\u201d I rasped, fighting against the urge to start crying immediately.\u00a0<\/p>\n
At my question, his frown deepened; And for a moment, he looked embarrassed, but then he sighed and looked away, pulling me into his arms.\u00a0<\/p>\n
This way, I could feel his chest pressing against mine. I could feel the steady thumping of his heart as it beat in sync with mine. I could feel his skin- soft and sturdy\u2026 his breath fanning my face\u2026 and I instantly knew for a fact that I never wanted to be away from him. That I always wanted to be by his side.\u00a0<\/p>\n
I tipped my head backward in such a way that my eyes now met his. And with a small voice, I asked; \u201cDo you love me?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
Goddess, I do not know why I asked that. I do not know why the thought of being away from him filled me with so much panic that I had begun to spew gibberish.\u00a0<\/p>\n
My hands shot out to cup his face when he tried to look away and I whispered;\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cPlease\u2026 talk to me.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
Jay looked conflicted. He looked like something in my question had rattled him to no end. His eyes filled with emotions I couldn\u2019t name\u2026 and there was this slight tremor in his hands- barely there but I had felt it.\u00a0<\/p>\n
When I put my hands on his face again, he flinched slightly, but quickly shook himself\u00a0<\/p>\n
out of it and smiled. \u201cLeilani\u2026\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cYou don\u2019t have to respond to it anymore if it makes you uncomfortable\u2014\u201d I began to say but stopped when he placed his index finger over my lips.\u00a0<\/p>\n
Sparks flew from that contact, and if it wasn\u2019t for my self control, maybe I would\u2019ve moaned in bliss. Maybe I would\u2019ve instantly turned into a mini Chalice. I mean, we\u00a0<\/p>\n
15:38\u00a0<\/p>\n
2\/5\u00a0<\/p>\n
204 I don\u2019t care!\u00a0<\/p>\n
were twins after all!\u00a0<\/p>\n
I squeezed my eyes shut.\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cI am not uncomfortable,\u201d he drawled in that voice that felt like silk- smooth, velvety\u2014 it set my skin on fire. He whispered; \u201cI just\u2026 I do not know how to say this Leilani, but for now, all I can tell you is that you mean the absolute world to me. You\u2019re the reason I want to wake up every morning despite being scared of what the day would bring\u2026\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201c\u2014Of what the day would bring?\u201d I asked quietly, half expecting him to brush the question off. But to my utmost surprise, he nodded and squeezed my hands tightly.\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s a constant fear at the back of my mind\u2026 a voice that tells me that my present day may be my last day sane, and I\u2019d die before I rope you into a world where there\u2019s a constant: fear\u2026 plus maybe a bit of insecurity\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cBut Jarek\u2026\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cI almost hurt you, Leilani. In fact, I did. And I can never forgive myself for doing that. I can never forgive myself for breaching the safe haven I\u2019ve always wished for you to be protected in. I love you Lani. Probably more than words could ever describe\u2026 And for you, I want to be better. I want to be healed-\u00a0<\/p>\n
2\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd you want to\u2026 you know, leave\u2026 for it?\u201d I finished for him, just as tears burned at the corners of my eyes.\u00a0<\/p>\n
He nodded. \u201cYes. But only for a short while-\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cI can come with you.\u201d I snapped, immediately interrupting him; And as soon as I did, his eyes widened. A sure slow smile spread across his face. One that he quickly contained before he shook his head again.\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cNo?\u201d I was stunned. \u201cWhy?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cBecause I\u2019ve put you in charge of Frostclaw.Inc.\u201d He said, causing my already aching heart to sink further into my guts.\u00a0<\/p>\n
Something about those words- which I suspected he had said in order to make me feel better-rattled me.\u00a0<\/p>\n
It made my heart race, but not in the: \u2018butterflies in my tummy\u2019 kind of way. Sweat pooled under my eyebrows, or maybe it was my tears, but I brushed it away and whispered; \u201cJay?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n
But he wasn\u2019t looking at me. He wasn\u2019t responding either.\u00a0<\/p>\n
15:39\u00a0<\/p>\n
3\/5\u00a0<\/p>\n
204 I don\u2019t care!\u00a0<\/p>\n
And I knew\u2026 I just knew that his so-called short trip may not be a short one.\u00a0<\/p>\n
-And goddess, I didn\u2019t like the sound of that. I didn\u2019t want it to happen. So I did the one thing I could think of in this moment of desperation; I pulled him into a hug and kissed him, hoping that maybe my kiss could tell him the words I couldn\u2019t say.\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u2026and hoping that he at least changes his mind, and takes me with him. 5\u00a0<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t care!\u00a0<\/p>\n
66\u00a0<\/p>\n
Happy new year my lovely readers, and thank you!\u00a0<\/p>\n
Ahvahh_\u00a0<\/p>\n
Creator\u2019s Thoughts\u00a0<\/p>\n
15:39\u00a0<\/p>\n
4\/5<\/p>\n
Healing Slowly But Surely By R. Joseph 204 \u00a0 204 I don\u2019t care!\u00a0 204 I don\u2019t care!\u00a0 Leilani.\u00a0 It took […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[56],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-23407","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-chosen-by-none-feared-by-all"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23407","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23407"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23407\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23407"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23407"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kezpres.xyz\/novelreading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23407"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}