Hope Is Not Optional — Manuel Flores 46
Chapter 46
Chapter 46
Selene
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They said when you die, your entire life flashes before your eyes.
It’s the same when you awaken your wolf.
The only difference is that death ends everything, and awakening decides who you become next.
If you want a wolf, you face trials. Tests that pull apart your mind, strip your heart bare, and force your soul to prove it’s strong enough to hold another being inside it. Many fail. Their wolves look into their hearts, find them unworthy, and refuse to bond.
Those people become wolfless.
In this world, being wolfless was worse than being an omega, because it meant you were alive, but hollow. And if the normal trials for a wolf were difficult, the trial for a Moonborn’s white wolf was far more merciless.
It wasn’t just about strength or willpower. It was about confronting everything you were, everything you had done, and everything you feared becoming again, until you found a way out.
When I opened my eyes, darkness was all I saw. It was so thick and endless. I blinked several times, rubbing my eyes, but nothing changed. The air was cold, and quiet. I looked down and noticed something faintly glowing in my hand.
A lamp.
Its light was dim, barely enough to pierce through the dark, but it was something. I lifted it carefully, its warm glow brushing against my skin, and took a deep breath.
I remembered the trials well, across all nine of my past lives. Each time had been different, and each time I had barely survived. The trial changed, twisted, adapting to your heart’s weakness. It was not something you could prepare for, no matter how many times you experienced it. And yet, here I was again, testing myself once more.
I exhaled, steadying my breath, and took a step forward. The sound of my own footsteps echoed softly, swallowed by the darkness. It was so silent that even the rhythm of my breathing sounded loud.
I kept walking, but everything stayed the same. At this point, I figured I’d just keep going until I found an exit. Some people found theirs almost immediately and awakened their wolves. I thought maybe it would be the same for me this time.
Just when I thought it would never end, a small, broken sob reached my ears,
I froze.
It came from somewhere to my right, like a child trying to cry quietly so no one would hear. My grip on the lamp tightened as I followed it until I saw a small figure, huddled beneath a large, gnarled tree. Her arms were wrapped tightly around her knees, her shoulders trembling as she cried.
Even without seeing her face, I knew exactly who she was.
I slowly sat beside her, the soft glow of the lamp spilling over her small frame.
She didn’t look up. Her voice was quict, and hoarse, when she muttered, “Leave.”
I let out a soft sigh and shook my head. “You know, we really look ugly when we cry.”
The little girl froze, then slowly lifted her head, and my heart clenched. Black and white strands framed her face, and a younger version of me stared back, tears streaking her cheeks, lips trembling.
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Chapter 46
I smiled faintly.
I remembered this place. I used to come here all the time, back when I was a child. No one ever came looking for me. No one ever noticed when I was gone.
I would sit under this same tree, just like that, crying until my eyes burned. Crying until I couldn’t anymore. And then, I’d wipe my face, stand up, and go back home pretending to be fine.
Seeing it now was almost cruel. But that was the nature of the trial. It didn’t care about what you wanted to forget. It made you face it.
“W-who are you?” Her voice trembled as she looked up at me, eyes still glossy with tears. “You’re not allowed here,” she said quickly, wiping her face with the back of her sleeve. Her voice cracked on the last word, but she tried to make it sound firm.
“I’m no one important,” I said. My hand reached out almost on instinct, brushing her hair gently before resting on her head. “I just came here to do something.”
She blinked up at me, eyes narrowing as though she was trying to understand me. But she gave a tiny nod and muttered, “Then go do what you want and leave, please.”
Even as a child, I was trying so hard to push people away while quietly begging them to stay.
I stood up slowly, brushing the dirt off my dress. Looking down at her, I said, “I will leave now. But before I do, let me give you a little advice.”
She tilted her head, blinking at me in confusion. “Advice?”
“Don’t hide,” I said.
She frowned. “Don’t hide?”
I nodded gently. “Yes. We don’t need to hide anymore. We’re stronger than we look.”
Her face twisted in confusion, brows drawn, lips parting slightly as if she wanted to ask what I meant. But I didn’t stay long enough to explain. I turned away, the lamp flickering faintly in my hand.
“Let me give you some advice too,” my younger self said behind me. “Try to remember, Selene.”
I froze and turned back, but she was gone, as if she had never been there at all.
What was that?
The darkness seemed to press in around me, heavier than before. I lifted the lamp higher, its weak glow barely holding the shadows back. My footsteps echoed softly as I forced myself to move forward, trying to shake off what had just happened and focus on finding the next part of the trial. But a hand grabbed miné.
I froze instantly, breath catching in my throat, Slowly, I turned to see Kane.
He stood beside me, tall and confident, his lips curved into that charming grin that always used to make the maids giggle.
“Kane…?” I whispered. “What are you doing here?”
“What do you mean what am I doing?” he asked, laughing softly. “We’ve been looking everywhere for you, sister.”
Before I could even respond, another voice sounded from behind him.
“Where did you run off to, Selene?” Cross asked casually, though there was an edge of concern beneath his tone. He leaned lazily against the wall, wearing that same indifferent expression he always did, like nothing in the world could truly bother
him.
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Chapter 46
I stared at them, frozen in place. “A-are you talking to me?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
Kane chuckled, shaking his head. “Of course we’re talking to you. Who else would we be talking to? You’re our baby sister.”
Baby sister?
Something inside me twisted. It didn’t sound right. It didn’t feel right. But my thoughts were hazy, my mind clouded and sluggish, too foggy to understand why this felt so wrong.
I wanted to speak, to ask why they were here, but the words wouldn’t come out.
I blinked.
What was I doing again?
Why was I here?
Kane and Cross both frowned when I didn’t answer. Kane’s hand squeezed mine, his tone gentle now. “Are you okay, Selene?”
I looked up at him, my vision slightly hazy, a dull throb spreading behind my eyes. “Y-yeah… I think so. I just―” I pressed a hand to my temple. “I just forgot what I was doing. I remember I was doing something important, but I don’t know what.”
Cross sighed, running a hand through his messy hair. “She’s acting strange. Kane, carry her. We’ll take her to the physician.”
“What? No, I’m fine,” I protested weakly, trying to pull away, but Kane was already bending down.
In one smooth motion, he lifted me effortlessly into his arms.
My voice caught in my throat.
His warmth, and heartbeat felt too real. But somewhere in the back of my mind, a whisper told me: They’re not here. This isn’t real. Still, I didn’t fight it. I was too tired, and confused.
The lamp flickered in my hand once more, then went out.
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