BAYANDA
18 .
BAYANDA
I don’t know where the “feeling drained” thing comes from, but I suddenly feel like that. Maybe because I slept the day working harder than I usually do. My job is getting serious by the day and the kids come in everyday. They’re scaring me at some point but I am determined to not give up.
I badly wanted to call an uber but honestly. I’m too tired. My feet are killing me, my body is just tired today. So Katlego offered to pick me up, I don’t know what’s happening between us but I know for sure that best friends don’t kiss like that. He’s not even trying to tell me what’s going on and i really don’t have the courage to ask him.
“Who’s coming to pick you up today? you haven’t left?” Dr Mvundla says entering my office, I heave a light sigh—I really didn’t want to speak to anyone right now. I’m just in a bad mood, maybe I’m near my date. Thats why I’m switching up like this.
“No one, I just want to sit and relax for about an hour before I can go home. I’m not feeling very well.” I say, her being in the same room as me is pissing me off—she just needs to learn to leave people alone sometimes.
“Oh, I think you should know by now that I know you and you’re lying right now. Come on, tell me.. who are you in a relationship with?” She asks me, something’s turning inside me and I don’t know what it is.
“I’m not in any relationship. Can you give me some space? I’m sitting in here for a reason, I just need to breathe. Today was a lot, I can barely walk now.” I say, I’m emotionally and physically drained at the same time.
“Ohh, askis. Sorry, let me leave you. I will see you tomorrow.” She says walking out and closing the door. I sigh in relief and sit back, just as I lay my head on my seat. The door opens and I raise forward.
“Hey..” He says, wait.. Dr Mvundla must’ve seen him on her way out, oh I’ll never hear the end of it tomorrow.
“Hi, thanks for coming to pick me up.” I say, he smiles and gives me a reassuring nod.
“It’s okay. So you’re not going to your house?” He asks me, I forgot that I have to pack some clothes at my house. I did say I’m spending a few days at his place.
“We can go, I’m just too tired right now but it’s fine. I’ll pack.” I say getting up and packing up my stuff. I know I should’ve packed way before he got here but I’m just a girl, leave me alone please.
“Or I can go and pack for you..” He says, I instantly shake my head. I don’t let anyone touch my things because then, they’ll disorganize them and I’ll have to start from scratch. I have a certain way of packing my things.
“There’s no way I’m letting you pack for me, oh no..” I say, he chuckles and grabs my handbag.
“Let’s go then, before you pass out. You even have eyebags, you must be really tired.” He says, holding my hand as we walk out. What is he holding my hand for now? only if he knew how these gossipers are.
We head out of the hospital and I finally get to breathe out. The amount of stares we got inside? I’m afraid I’m gonna be the topic tomorrow, he opens the door for me and I get in.
“Should we get some food first?” He asks me, I shake my head.
“You get some for yourself only, I’m not really hungry. I just want to take a shower and sleep.” I say, he nods and closes my door. He proceeds to walk around to his side, he opens the door and gets in.
“I bumped into your uncle today, lucky enough.. he’s gonna be working with our company.” He says, I glance at him—he has that grin on his face.
“And he recognized you?” I ask him, he nods. I thought he would have already forgotten Katlego’s appearance by now.
“Yeah and we did have a little talk about you.” He says, I raise my eyebrow. I wonder what they were discussing about me.
“It’s nothing too hectic, it was good seeing him though. For a moment, I felt like that little boy again. Everything seemed to be so perfect.” He says, there are certain times where we feel like that.
“That’s nice. Judging by how you’re happy you are, everything must’ve went well.” I say, he nods and starts the engine.
“Everything’s perfect.” He says driving off, I don’t really sleep that much when I’m on the road. I fail to sleep, I feel like the sound of the car on its own is a distraction.
“How long am I staying at your place for? I can’t stay for long.” I say, he glances at me then back at the road.
“How about forever?” He asks me, I sigh. He knows that’s not possible, I’ve never cohabited with anyone in my life and I certainly won’t start now, i have my own place.
“Forget it..” I say, he chuckles.
“You can leave whenever you want to leave, I just don’t want you to leave as of yet. I’m still enjoying your company.” He says, is he enjoying my company or my lips? I’m confused, it could be both.
“Are you sure you’re enjoying my company?” I ask him, he smirks a bit. He’s not only enjoying my company this one.
“What do you mean? of course I’m enjoying your company. It’s really evident Yanda.” He says, yes.. my stomach is turning now. I don’t know what he says or does that makes me feel this way.
“I’m just asking.” I say, leaning back and closing my eyes. I’m not sleeping, I’m just zoning out before Katlego makes me lose my mind.
—
We’re at my house right now, I’m in my closet packing another bag. I’m just taking things that are going to push me through the week, I’m gonna stay for a week and then return to my house. I’m sure it misses me too even though it’s gonna be a little hard to stay here after the break-in .
Once I’m done packing the bag, I take my toiletry bag and walk out of my bedroom. I turn off the lights after I walk out, Katlego is sitting in the lounge—he managed to reach for the album he gave to me that day and he’s currently looking at it right now.
I walk down the stairs, I haven’t replaced the furniture that Sipho broke so the house looks a little empty right now. I’ll sort that out when I come back.
“I’m done, we can go.” I say, I think he doesn’t hear me because he’s not moving from the couch. He’s just staring at the album with a smile on his face, I heave a sigh.
“Katlego..” I call out to him, he finally snaps out of it and glances at me.
“Sorry, let’s go.” He says, getting up.
“Can I take this?” He asks me, I nod walking out. He has the keys so he’ll lock the front door. I walk to the car, which wasn’t locked. I thought that was totally unsafe but he didn’t seem scared.
I get in and he walks to the car seconds later, he gets in and starts the engine. He drives off, playing some music.
“What if your mom comes to your apartment during the week? what is she gonna think of me?” I ask him, he shakes his head.
“Don’t worry about that, she’d be more than delighted to see you.” He says, I nod lightly. I don’t know how she’d be delighted when she was the one who separated Katlego and I in the first place.
We finally reach his apartment, it does feel like home now. I have so many homes, it’s insane. We walk inside after he locks the car and unlocks the door of the apartment.
“Let me go place that in the bedroom for you.” He says taking my bag, I was about to go shower but okay. I grab a bottle of water in the fridge, a very cold one. I needed it, I’m even sweating.
“Are you sure you’re not hungry? I’m about to order food for myself.” He says, I nod.
“I’m okay for today, trust me.” I say, he nods and takes his phone. I walk to the guest bedroom, I walk inside expecting to find my bag on the bed but it’s not here.
I walk to his bedroom and find my bag on his bed. I’m pretty sure he did this on purpose, this man..
“Don’t relocate, you’re sleeping in this room now.” He says standing by the door. I turn around and glance at him.
“What do you mean? this is your bedroom.” I say, he nods and walks to me. He stands infront of me, yes my knees just weakened. It’s not even a surprise anymore.
“I mean exactly that Yanda, this is your room now.” He says before heaving a sigh.
“I can’t seem to sleep without holding you anymore. I need you besides me.” He says, sending shivers all over my body. Good shivers? I guess do.
“Why?” I ask him, he reaches for my head and brings it towards him. He plants a kiss on my forehead, eww.. I was sweating a few minutes back—how can he kiss my forehead now.
“Do you wanna know why?” He asks me, I mean.. I just asked him why so I obviously wanna know.
“Mhh..” I say, his hand is now brushing my cheek. He’s looking at me, his eyes are full of something I can’t even describe.
“Because I love you..” He says, I raise my head and glance at him. I’m staring at him, did he just say he loves me?
“What?” I say, why am I not shocked? I should be shocked that my own best friend loves me, but why am I not shocked?
“I love you Bayanda, I love you as a best friend and you already know that but.. there’s a different love that I feel for you. A love that wants to make you mine, a love that has grown from the first time I saw you.” He says, I blink once and except to wake up from the dream but I’m genuinely not dreaming.
“Please pinch me..” I say, closing my eyes—I’m about to burst into tears, why is he doing this to me? he chuckles and does as I say, he gently pinches me and I open my eyes. Bayanda, you’re not dreaming.
“I want to make you mine, you’re my best friend before anything and I thank God that I met you as a best friend first before falling for you. That, for me has built something even greater. I didn’t think that we’d ever meet again but my heart never forgot you and you could make it beat fast even when we were miles apart from each other.” He says, a part of me wants to faint right now but I’d be a fool if I faint. I’m not a dramatic person so I’ll pass.
“You love me?” I ask him, he confidently nods.
“Way more than I thought.” He says, I heave a sigh and look down for a few seconds. He raises my head with his finger on my chin, I know my eyes are full of tears right now because he’s getting blurry by each second.
“I don’t know what’s in your heart but I know that this friendship is the foundation of something far more greater. I trust you more than I trust myself Yanda.” He says, I don’t know when he had the time to wrap his arms around my waist. He’s too close.
“That sounds like a line from a movie or something.” I say, he chuckles and shakes his head.
“It’s from my heart.” He says, bringing his face closer to mine. Please tell me why I’m smiling. I didn’t even say anything to him. Why am I so relaxed? the poor man just confessed.
“Do you need time to digest all of this?” He asks me, his lips are an inch apart from mine and he’s speaking? what’s wrong with him?
“Time for what?” I ask him, before smashing my own lips on his. He feels a little bit tall now, or am I shrinking? he pins me against the wall and kisses me, slowly—but so passionately.
My arms are wrapped around his neck, the kiss is accelerating. There goes my breathing pattern! he slowly pulls out of the kiss and I open my eyes.
“What’s wrong?” I ask him.
“You didn’t respond..” He says, oh.. my mind is slow as always. I haven’t even responded to his confession. I didn’t expect it, but it’s not a shock, okay? it almost feels like I’ve been waiting for it for a while now.
“Can we talk in the morning when I’m refreshed? I just want you to kiss me right now, just.. kiss me.” I say, I don’t know what the hell I just said but I said it.
to be continued.